In  March 1996, the ex-hole who had been living with his mommy for 3 years, remarried.  He decided, at this time, he wanted to be a daddy.  He was an uninvolved father up until this point.  I think most of this stemmed from the wife in law though, in the fact they did not like paying child support.  Oh well.

Now, he had a child from a previous relationship, at age 15.  A daughter, Lisa.  He never had contact with Lisa, unless I did it for him.  I would take off work for 2 weeks during the summers to care for her and do step-mom/step-daughter things.  I would take her shopping, buy school clothes.  I am the one who would pick her up at the airport and take her back to the airport.  I am the one who would send birthday, Christmas, Easter, Valentines, and the likes.  Not him.  So this pattern was nothing new for him.  (No wife to do it FOR him, so screw the innocent little kids.)  Well, he had him a new wife now. 

The children flew to Oregon for summer visitation May 1996, as they had every year. (this year I sent them 2 weeks early because of CPS on my butt for NOTHING!_  Only, they did not return in July 1996 as required.  I would call the the kids 2-3 times a week while they were at their fathers.   Beginning July 1, sixteen days before the children were do to return home, no one would ever answer the phone, or return any calls.  I would try 10 times a day.  All times, all hours.  No response.  The children did not return.  He and his slime ball attorney, C. David Hall, filed in Oregon, which did not have jurisdiction under UCCJA, for ex-parte emergency custody, which Judge Elizabeth Welch granted......and me  having no knowledge of this all along until August 2, 1996, when I was "served" with the papers. 

I concurrently filed in Arizona, the children's state of residency, for Custodial Interference and kidnapping.  I could not get ahold of anyone and had no idea where my boys were, or if they were OK.  PPD and Multonomah County Sheriff's office claimed the could do nothing more than a welfare check on the kids. 

I obtained counsel in Oregon, and without a doubt, the whole case was dismissed, and the children were returned.....2 and a half months later than scheduled, but none the less,  they were returned.

The ex-hole hired a lying attorney in Arizona, Marjorie Fisher Cunningham.  Her mother is a former juvey   judge.   How convenient.  In august 1997, we had a custody trial that involved bogus CPS files, and alleged abuse by the children against him and his wife.

He lied through his teeth, so did his wife.  My most memorable lie that they told, was actually told by the wife.   When asked if they made the children eat bars of soap for lying or saying a bad word, like shutup, fart, or butt.  The children weren't calling names like "HEy you_______"(insert any foul language here).  Well, anyway, when the wife was asked if they engaged in this form of punishment, she said, "Yes we do.  But the children like it.  We use flavored soaps like peach, raspberry and stuff.   The children do not mind eating the soap."  I couldda fallen off my chair!  Never, in my 7 years of raising my children alone, did they ever ever ever say to me, "NO MOMMY!!!!!  PLEASE!!!!!  DO NOT SEND ME TO MY ROOM FOR TIME OUT!   LET ME PLEASE EAT SOME SOAP!!!!!"  Shit.....this one still cracks me up!   Anyway, this is just one example of the ex-hole and his wife's mentality and expertise on child rearrage!.

Despite the evidence, the court felt he was the one to have custody at this time.  This is taken directly from the Court's Minute Entry awarding him custody.  "Mr. XXX, has shown more stability since the divorce of the parties.  He has remarried and Ms. XXX has not.   She is residing with her boyfriend of 2 years, Mr. TimXXX.  Mr. XXX lives now with his mother in the home he grew up in.  Ms. XXX is here in Arizona, and her entire family support network is located in Oklahoma.  Mr. XXX works for Federal Express and Ms. XXX works for Circle K.  Her job is one that is more demanding and dangerous than that of Mr. XXX.  Therefore, it is decided that Mr. XXX is the more appropriate parent for primary physical custody, with joint custody to each parent."

WOW!!!!!  Is that all I had to do?  Run out and marry the first person I met and move in with my mommy and daddy? 

Since the change of custody, 10-25-1997, things have steadily gone down hill.  The ex-hole and wife in law, do everything in their power to interfere with my relationship with the children.   Frequently, phone calls are not allowed.  Also, phone calls are NOT allowed by ANY member of my family at all.  My dad only gets to talk to his grandchildren when they are here in Tucson.  Dad and step mom do not allow him to call them.  Refusal of monthly visitation.   Refusal to reimburse 1/2 of monthly plane fare to fly the children home.  Many of the things both NCM's and NCD's go through with a vindictive ex spouse. 

This last year and a half has been a constant struggle for justice.

A struggle with CPS and the lies of a Tucson case worker, Patricia  Jansen .

A struggle with my strength and endurance.  Wondering daily, where will I get the strength to fight again tomorrow.  Somehow, I have the strength every day.  Thank you God.

Well, he now, as of 6-18-99, has a warrant out for his arrest for contempt of court.  The judge in our case has had it with him and  his continual  contemptuous behavior.  I would love to share the rest of the story and the things the court and Judge have in play right now, but I will not jinx myself. 

As of 6-22-99, he sent me the money.  Amazing.  Trying to keep his ass outta jail I suppose!!!!

7-4-99 NOW I can tell...   :) .....the judge was afraid dad would not send the boys for my summer visitation, so she ordered that if the boys were NOT sent here, he would be arrested and custody would immediately go to me.

7-29-99, Judge has ordered him to reimburse the full $828 that I have spent on plane fare to exercise my court ordered visitation, despite the impediments he has imposed upon me.  This was a default judgement as he did not respond (and the courts gave him almost 2 months to file a complaint whereas Arizona Revised Statutes ONLY allow for a 20 day period to respond) to my Motion To Reconsider where I asked that he reimburse ALL the monies for plane fare that I have spent.  

8-12-99, CPS letter of apology and notation that the "findings" of "abuse/neglect" on my part are "invalid" has arrived!  The agency is reversing the "substantiations" of abuse/neglect to "INVALID COMPLAINTS" !!!!!!  The CPS page will now begin to 'come to life'.  I just had to wait until I recieved this letter. Be sure to check the CPS links for the injustice this agency has served my family.

8-13-99,  Petitions have been filed.  One for Temporary Custody Order Pending Resolution Of Petition For Change of Custody.  The other, a Verified Petition For Change of Custody.  The boys have been in school now for a week, and adjusting well.  They both look forward to staying in Tucson.

Also, the children disclosed this evening~~around 9 pm,  how step mom has been washing them in the shower when "we are in a hurry" to go somewhere.  The children assert that step mom is washing them (they are 9 and 11 year old boys~~with the 11 year old son developing rapidly and having much pubic hair) with her bare hand on their genitals, no wash rag is being used at all, simply step mom's BARE hand).  They also allege that she "shoves" the soap in thier "butt crack" and it "hurts".   In the words of the 9 year old, "...it pisses me off, Mom!!"

More to come I am sure!!!!!!!!

Last Update: 11/14/99

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